My Journey to Self-love | 5 Tips for Loving Yourself

Do you love yourself? Do you know how to love yourself? Today, I talk about my journey to self-love. It has been a long one, and a struggle at times. Some days it’s still struggle, but on those days, you just have to push through and pray for better days.

5 Tips for Loving Yourself

My story

This journey has been a long and difficult one for me. When I was younger, I was bullied about my weight, about my clothing choices, and about the fact that I didn’t have a designer bag (I was in sixth grade, and Coach was SO in). After my horrific middle school years were over, high school got a lot better and I hit my peak during junior and senior year. I was really involved in choir (I know it sounds nerdy, but it was so cool), and my senior year I was the choir president. Everything was perfect, especially those two years.

Once I graduated high school and went away to college, things changed. I think everyone goes through a transition period from college to high school, and everyone reacts to that type of life change differently. For me, I was a somewhat innocent girl growing up, and when I went away to college, I felt like I needed to break out of my shell and harness my newfound freedom. I joined a sorority, I made some friends, and I went wild. I partied often and wasn’t super focused on school. I didn’t realize it, but I started to hate who I had become; the girl I once was started to deteriorate.

After Christmas break, I came back to school and hid in my dorm room the entire semester. It may sound like I’m overreacting, but I honestly became a hermit. I didn’t want to talk to or see anyone except for a handful of people. I dropped out of my sorority and I felt like I deserved to be alone. My freshman year of college was probably one of the toughest I’ve ever had.

Following my spring semester as a freshman, I had a much needed break to go home for the summer, and I worked as a full-time nanny. This summer was also the summer that I got Molly, my beloved rescue dog. It’s no secret that I love dogs, but I got Molly for my anxiety and depression as well. More on Molly in a blog post coming soon, but basically, Molly helped me so much

Needless to say, it’s been quite the journey thus far. It has taken me a long time to love myself the way that I do now, but it isn’t a quick fix. Loving yourself is something that you have to work towards everyday. Now I’m going to share with you some things I do to love myself each and every day.


How to love yourself 

  1. Never ever let anyone tell you that you aren’t good enough. I’m just going to be honest here, I have dated people who told me I wasn’t good enough, pretty enough, smart enough. I’ve heard it all, and I let it effect the way I felt about myself. Now, I know that when people put you down, you need to drop them. Toxic people are something you do not need in your life, which snowballs into my next point.
  2. Surround yourself with loving and supportive people. I’ve been blessed with a supportive family who will be there every step of the way with me, and a handful of friends that I can count on.
  3. Get motivated. In my last post, I talked about how to get motivated. When you’re doing something with your life and you are achieving your goals, you’ll be happier and you will love yourself a little more.
  4. Remember that you were fearfully and wonderfully made. God created you, and only one of you. He took his time and made something precious. Every single person on this earth has a purpose in life, including you. Keep than in mind the next time you are doubting or hating on yourself.
  5. Make time for yourself, and give yourself a break. Sometimes we just need a break. I am almost always stressed or anxious, and sometimes I just need to take a step back and destress. By taking care of yourself, you are showing yourself love. Your relationship with yourself is similar to a relationship with a significant other (it is also just as important). Take care of yourself, show yourself that you love yourself and you will start to believe it.

christian, fearfully and wonderfully made, christian blogger, blog, how to love yourself, psalm 139

 

Self-love is not something that comes easily; just like anything else worth something in life, you must work for it. Walking by your faith each and every day, and learning to love yourself has a huge impact on how happy you are. Try out my tips and watch the love you have for yourself grow.

How do you show yourself that you love yourself?

Always,

40 Comments

  1. May 19, 2016 / 3:28 pm

    When that moment of truth arrives, when you know you are worthy, it’s a big deal. Don’t let anyone keep you down!

  2. May 19, 2016 / 5:12 pm

    I had a really rough college experience; I dropped out my sophomore year from severe depression/anxiety, and I am so happy to see you are doing well now! It’s such an uphill battle to love yourself after wasting years not. I love number four, “remember you are fearfully and wonderfully made”. When I’m on the struggle bus now, I often find myself whispering those words in my head: “I am Fearfully and Wonderfully Made.”

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 19, 2016 / 5:19 pm

      So sorry to hear you had such a rough time. It definitely is an uphill battle. That is one of my favorite verses! Much love 🙂

  3. May 19, 2016 / 5:51 pm

    Great tips! I often take moments to myself. It’s the best form of self love for me.

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 19, 2016 / 6:00 pm

      Love that!

  4. May 19, 2016 / 5:53 pm

    Yes! Yes! Yes! Loving yourself is the best thing you can do!

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 19, 2016 / 6:00 pm

      Agreed! Thanks for reading 🙂

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 1:19 am

      Thanks for reading, Danielle! Love your blog 🙂

  5. May 20, 2016 / 2:38 pm

    #1 is probably were I need to take my stand! I feel like I so easily want other people to give me confidence and I get upset if they don’t say something I want to hear. Definitely has to come from within me!

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 2:55 pm

      Love that! You can do it girl 🙂 You’re your biggest fan.

  6. May 20, 2016 / 2:40 pm

    Thank you for sharing! I am glad you are doing better! Self-love is such a hard thing, I struggle with it too and I was never bullied to that extent. I have to remind myself often to be “gentle” on myself and to talk to myself as I would a friend. We are often our worst critics!

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 2:56 pm

      Thank you! It is SO important to be gentle on ourselves and not beat ourselves up over little slip ups. Thanks for reading!

  7. May 20, 2016 / 2:48 pm

    We’ve hit a lot of the same points in our stories. I was bullied in middle school for my lack of fashion, my awkwardness, and my love of books. It got better in high school. I was involved in choir and was choir president. I didn’t do the sorority thing my freshman fall… I met a guy and got engaged… and un-engaged. It was really hard from there and I felt a bit hermit-ish because I’d missed out on making good friendships because I was so wrapped up in the relationship. I ended up going to counseling my freshman spring because I couldn’t sit in church (a whole other issue) or allow people to care about me without bursting into tears. It’s been a long road, and I can still be pretty hard on myself, but I’ve got the support of a loving family and husband to remind me to ease up on myself. I’ve always been one to set near impossible goals, but I’m learning that it’s okay if I don’t make them or change my mind. Thank you so much for sharing. It’s helped me look at my past in a healthier way.

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 2:58 pm

      I love that we have similar stories (I don’t love that this happened to us, but I’m glad that we can relate). I’m glad you are doing better and have the support of your family and friends. I think self-love is an ongoing journey, and perfection is never attainable, but the important thing is that we are trying 🙂 So glad we could relate and share our stories. Sending much love you way!

  8. May 20, 2016 / 3:39 pm

    I love those 5 self love tips! It’s so important to love yourself, but it can be so hard for me to do that!! Last night I was in tears about something I hated about myself. I don’t spend enough time building myself up or focusing on how I’m fearfully and wonderfully made and He created me this way for a reason! Thanks for sharing!

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 4:54 pm

      Continually working and loving on yourself is the only way to get through those times of self doubt. It’s totally okay to have those moments of self doubt, but the most important part is working towards a better you. Sending so much love your way. Good luck on your journey to self love. <3

  9. May 20, 2016 / 4:01 pm

    Chels! (My name is Chelsea as well so I already like you 🙂 ) This is the first time visiting your blog and I love it. What a beautiful post. Thank you for being vulnerable with us and sharing your heart. Sharing self-love tips is such a great topic. I wrote a post about that myself a few months back. Best of luck on your continued journey! XO

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 4:52 pm

      It’s so fun meeting people with the same name 😉 Welcome to my blog! Thank you for your appreciation. I am going to go check out your blog today! Sending much love your way <3

  10. May 20, 2016 / 4:12 pm

    Beautiful post. I am sorry you got bullied but so happy you are on the journey to self love. We really are too hard on ourselves so you don’t need anyone in your life who is anything but motivative and supporting.

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 4:54 pm

      So true! Thanks for your input, Dia 🙂

  11. May 20, 2016 / 5:26 pm

    I love your positivity here, much needed for me today. And can we all take a moment and be thankful Coach is out! 🙂

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 6:30 pm

      So glad I could spread some positivity! Sending prayers for your day to get better. Thanks for reading!

  12. May 20, 2016 / 6:29 pm

    I love your tips, especially number 5. We are our harshest judges, and we deserve to give ourselves a break! Everyone needs a chance to recuperate every once in a while. 🙂

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 6:30 pm

      Thanks for reading, Samantha! ?

  13. May 20, 2016 / 8:12 pm

    All so true! And great reminders as well:) I also know that I’m not loving myself when I stop exercising and doing the things that make me feel good in my body (eating well is included here). So taking care of myself is loving myself too! Thanks for the thoughts!

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 20, 2016 / 9:51 pm

      Love that point about exercising and eating right! So true 🙂 Thanks for reading <3

  14. May 21, 2016 / 4:02 am

    I struggle with this sometimes, so I am always grateful for the suggestions.

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 21, 2016 / 4:04 am

      Thanks for reading, Beth 🙂

  15. May 21, 2016 / 1:34 pm

    Wonderful reminders. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve learned the importance of surrounding myself with people who are good for my soul. There’s just no room for the other ones. Great post, girl.

    http://mykindofsweet.com/

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 21, 2016 / 1:44 pm

      I love that. Slowly but surely I’m working on creating a healthy and positive environment for myself. Thank you for reading, Suzanne!

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 21, 2016 / 1:45 pm

      Thank you so much, Missy! I appreciate it 🙂

  16. May 23, 2016 / 3:32 am

    Making time for yourself is so important! I’m glad you’ve found a way to get back to loving yourself. 🙂

  17. May 23, 2016 / 12:07 pm

    This totally resonates with my , Chels. I was also bullied so badly in middle school – girls in the sixth grade can just be so mean. And I also ended up being super involved in the chorus and ran it in high school, too! And similarly to you, college was also a crazy transition. But you’re right – this journey to loving yourself just has to be a consistent, dedicated effort. We are worth it!

    Coming Up Roses

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 23, 2016 / 12:38 pm

      I love sharing my story and finding out I’m not the only one. You’re right! We are worth it 🙂

  18. Tamara Goyette
    May 24, 2016 / 4:33 am

    This is definitely something I struggle with, going to put some of these tips to work.

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 24, 2016 / 5:00 am

      It’s a journey, and I hope yours goes a little smoother with time. xoxo, Chels

  19. May 24, 2016 / 7:22 pm

    I had so many of the same experiences growing up. Living in a small town it was super hard to get away from it so I decided to graduate as a junior and move away for college. Now, years later, looking back on it all I wish I would have loved myself more then so that I could have stood up for myself. I loved your post and love all the tips you gave!! Thanks so much for sharing your story!!

    • coffeewithchelsea
      May 24, 2016 / 8:59 pm

      All we can is try and improve every day 🙂 Thank you for reading <3

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